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Tuesday 15 May 2012

The Prairie


We walk through the parking lot twice a day. It's overgrown with weeds. I call it the 'prairie' and imagine that I am a pioneer with my faithful hound. The puppy prefers to think of our strolls as 'patrols' and insists that he has to stop periodically for a thorough sniffing because he's working on his 'case.'

In the morning there are a lot of magpies, cackling loudly.

"Why don't you let me off leash so I can catch one for you?"

"It's ok. I don't think I want a dead magpie."

"Everybody wants a dead magpie," he pouts.

"No, really, I'm ok. Thanks."

Puppy gazes longingly at the magpies in the trees, with one forepaw half raised in hope. He thinks to himself: "Tomorrow she will change her mind and let me hunt magpie."

He particularly despises magpies because "They are mocking me!"

Monday 14 May 2012

My only answer, as ever,

... is to try harder.

Saturday 12 May 2012

Come to think of it



... when I was living in Toronto and depressed out of my wits, I looked at A LOT of photographs of Audrey Hepburn. It gave me the will to live.  I took out a ton of books from the library, full of glossy photographs, and told myself over and over that my life would be mine again, the way I wanted it. Thinking about how hard things were then still makes me feel sorry for myself. A little.

[image via This is Glamorous]


Monday 7 May 2012

The other rubber duck

The rubber ducky proof: get out your rubber duck and explain to him, line by line, what your code is suppose to do. Realize at some point that what you're saying is not what the code is doing. Thank the rubber duck and fix the code.

The other rubber ducky proof: get out your rubber duck and explain to him what you have to say. Is the rubber ducky asleep? If yes, wake the rubber duck, and try again with a shorter explanation. Repeat until the rubber duck can remain awake for the duration. 

Thursday 3 May 2012

拉風

倉庫的盆栽被大風吹倒了,躺在地上哎哎叫。老闆要去牽車的時候順手把它扶正。盆栽說「唉呦,這麼拉風真是危險」。「不是拉風啦,」車子聽到了忍不住插話,「是招風!」。「這麼拉風,也真麻煩,」盆栽不理它,只顧著一面整理自己的葉子,一面喃喃自語。「齁,怎麼有這麼白目的盆栽啊,」車子一面開在路上一面想著,「沒有輪子,怎麼可能拉風呢?... 嘖」。(「想當年,人家才拉風勒... 哼!」。倉庫的盆栽還在風中打理自己的枝幹,一面發出自滿的沙沙聲)。