Really?

I think that our perceptions of gender are very socially conditioned.

Tonight at dinner the waitress told me that she thought I was a boy. I wanted to say "is it because Taiwanese boys are so effeminate?" Either that or take a leaf out of my family friend's book and say "瞎了你的狗眼". But I just smiled and walked away. My mother said "This goes to show that a girl should be pretty." I replied "Taiwanese people basically judge your sex by hair length" - because when I had long hair, this was never an issue. My mom still didn't think this was a case of gender stereotyping. My conclusion: "fuck that."

Too radical? Perhaps. But I'm fed up. If you look beyond very superficial attributes (make-up or not, hair length, style of clothing and footwear), it's pretty easy to tell that I am not a boy (no Adam's apple, no facial hair, voice is not deep enough).

Though the way I dress is often considered androgynous even in the West, I still hate the idea that girls should look a certain way, i.e. pretty. Says who? Fuck that.

I am a girl. I've never had trouble finding myself a man. I can be pretty, and I can be ugly. I can be gentle, or I can be strong. I can be demure, or I can be out-going. Because I am a multi-faceted human-being, not a fashion spread mirage. So please don't tell me how I ought to go about being a girl.

I'm not angered by one person's mistake. Rather, I am voicing a complaint on behalf of all those who do not naturally conform to the 'ideal' as formulated by society and media. This is also why I refrained from rudeness to the waitress; after all we are all products of our environment. Yet I also believe that we are not condemned to only be shaped by society without the right to mold it in return. This is why I find it important to speak my mind on such issues.

我覺得我們對性別(gender)的印象受社會的影響很大。

昨天一個人在長庚附近一個人隨便吃飯。餐廳小姐說『我以為你是男生！』。我衝動的想回她『是不是因為台灣的男生都太娘了？』，甚至『瞎了你的狗眼』。但是我沒有，只有笑笑的走出去。我媽說『啊, 這告訴我們, 一個好好的女生, 要弄成漂亮的女生樣』。我說『基本上台灣人只認長髮與短髮而已』因為我從前頭髮長的時候從來沒有這個問題。她仍然覺得這不是性別刻板印象 (gender stereotype) 的問題。我的結論：『fuck that』。

太偏激了嗎？可能吧，但是我受夠了。只要看透了一些非常表面的東西（畫不畫裝，頭髮多長，穿不穿女性化的衣服與鞋子），就可以知道我不可能是男生（沒有喉結，沒有鬍鬚，說話聲音不夠低）。

雖然我的打扮就算在國外也可以算是中性，但是我痛恨有人覺得『女生』就是應該把自己弄成某個樣子，就是應該『漂亮』。誰說女生就是要漂亮？FUCK THAT.

我是女生。我從來沒有找不到男人的問題。我可以要漂亮，也可以要醜，可以要溫柔，也可以要強壯，可以要涵蓄，也可以要自信 - 因為我是個有層次的活人，不是時尚雜誌裡的假象。所以請妳別來告訴我怎麼當女生。

我並不是為了一個人的判斷錯誤而生氣，而是為了媒體與社會將女性塑造成一個死板『理想型』而為所以有天生就不是那個『理想型』的女生打抱不平。這也是我沒有當場跟那位小姐翻臉的原因，畢竟我們都是社會環境的產物。但是我不認為我們只有被社會塑造的份，而沒有反過來塑造社會的權力，所以對我來說發表自己的意見是有這個涵意的。