Language Barrier

Customer, to her daughter: “Pregúntale a la muchacha si hay más de esta.” (“Ask the girl if there is more of this.”)

Me: “¿De cual tela, señora?” (“Which fabric, ma’am?”)

Customer: “How dare you?”

Me: “I-I’m sorry?”

Customer: “You’re all the same. How dare you assume I don’t speak English!”

Me: “Ma’am, you asked your daughter to ask me a question in Spanish instead of asking me yourself. I assumed you were more comfortable with Spanish.”

Customer: “Well, I speak English just fine.”

Me: “I see that, yes. I was just trying to make things easier–”

Customer: “I just didn’t want to speak to YOU.”

http://notalwaysright.com/abusing-the-language-barrier/12417

I had a similar experience recently. Met someone at a bar. Registered that he doesn't look Taiwanese though didn't really think very much of it. He speaks to me in Chinese (accented), I respond in English. He says to me in Chinese 'I can speak Chinese you know,' as though it was rude of me to reply in English. I had to point out to him that I'm simply more comfortable socializing in a bar with strangers if I speak English, because my English is better than my Chinese.

Goes both ways, my friends. Just because I look Taiwanese doesn't mean that I a. speak Chinese more fluently, or b. am obligated to speak Chinese to you because you are speaking Chinese

That said, it's probably just as bad to be caucasian in Taiwan because everyone will assume you speak English. Would be rather inconvenient if your only languages of choice were Russian and Chinese...

Don't you

feel the need to confide sometimes?

我小時候

住在金門。親戚有一個開中藥店。店裡面的牆壁都是木頭做的小抽屜，也有大的木箱子。燈光暗暗的，空氣瀰漫著中藥的香味，木材的顏色很深。在店裡我坐在大木箱上，腳不著地，盪啊盪的。有人給我吃貢糖。花生味好濃，咬幾下就把牙齒都黏住，快張不開嘴了。

後來好像都不愛吃貢糖。

貢糖的外面是糯米的紙。在加拿大上小學的時候，同學看到我吃糯米紙包的糖都很驚訝，以為我在吃塑膠。我故意把糯米紙撕下來，放在舌頭上讓它融化。

I need

second, third, fourth, fifth... nth chances.

Please bear with me as I make slow progress.

To Althea, from prison

WHEN Love with unconfinèd wings
Hovers within my gates,
And my divine Althea brings
To whisper at the grates;
When I lie tangled in her hair
And fetter'd to her eye,
The birds that wanton in the air
Know no such liberty.

When flowing cups run swiftly round
With no allaying Thames,
Our careless heads with roses bound,
Our hearts with loyal flames;
When thirsty grief in wine we steep,
When healths and draughts go free—
Fishes that tipple in the deep
Know no such liberty.

When, like committed linnets, I
With shriller throat shall sing
The sweetness, mercy, majesty,
And glories of my King;
When I shall voice aloud how good
He is, how great should be,
Enlargèd winds, that curl the flood,
Know no such liberty.

Stone walls do not a prison make,
Nor iron bars a cage;
Minds innocent and quiet take
That for an hermitage;
If I have freedom in my love
And in my soul am free,
Angels alone, that soar above,
Enjoy such liberty.

- Richard Lovelace

自動洗

在用過加油站的自動洗車機之前，車子對「自動洗車」充滿了憧憬。大概像是跟不停吐出泡沫的章魚打架吧 · · ·而且還會轟隆轟隆叫勒· · ·只要打著空擋· · ·軟軟的章魚劈哩啪啦的按摩，好享受喔· · · 裡面下大雨，又有吹風機，洗出來就像是新車一樣，真高貴。（不知道為什麼，在車子的幻想裡，洗車的章魚總是綁著頭巾，而且說日文。）

去加油時看到自動洗車機在運轉，車子就又羨慕又忌妒的盯著人家。誰叫老闆小氣，都不花錢去自動洗？歹命喔，車子在心裡埋怨。雖然加油的時候喝的好飽，但是心中（其實應該是引擎中）的不滿足確無法彌補。

在路上，車子很怕人家發現自己沒有「經驗」。會被以為是鄉巴佬的！想到這點，它有點緊張，故意擺出「我是老台北」的表情。自己覺得很帥，但其實沒有人注意。

(其實手洗是比較高級的，但是車子不知道，所以覺得自動洗很稀奇。）

Now that you know (marginally) better

you need to do something constructive with your rage, or it will turn into aggression.

I will. I promise.

(I'm just waiting to know better yet again, and for fears to subside)

I spent this morning

running around the flat with puppy, arms flailing, shouting excitedly and inexplicably. You'd like my dog.

"Who, me?"

Many many things

remind me of you. If there were something I could do, I would. The hardest thing is understanding that doing nothing would be better.

傾城之戀，by 張愛玲

海灣裏有這麼一個地方，有的是密密層層的人，密密層層的燈，密密層層的耀眼的貨品 - 藍磁雙耳小花瓶、一捲一捲蔥綠堆金絲絨、玻璃紙袋裝著「巴島蝦片」、琥珀色的熱帶產的榴槤糕、拖著大紅穗子的佛珠、鵝黃的香袋、烏銀小十字架，寶塔頂的涼帽；然而在這燈與人與貨之外，還有那淒清的天與海 - 無邊的呼荒涼，無邊的恐怖。她的未來，也是如此 - 不能想，想起來只有無邊的恐怖。她沒有天長地久的計畫。只有在這眼前的瑣碎小東西裏，她的畏縮不安的心，能夠得到暫時的休息。

(from 第一爐香)

hi's and bye's

whenever it comes time to say goodbye I get all a bit panicked and sentimental.
I guess I have to remember that pretty soon I'll be worried about saying goodbye to other people. And it'll be time to say hello to you again!

太陽天

在大太陽下，車子曬的快要昏倒了，心裡不免埋怨老闆這麼不解車意，都沒有替它爭取有陰影的車位。好不容易日正當中的時候要回家去午休了，車子拖著沉重的輪胎，在太陽下吃力的跑著，覺得自己好辛苦喔，是不是應該罷工呢？而且都已經了七千公里了，還不替我換油，來經銷潤滑油的公司當經理，又有什麼用呢，車子想著想著，都快哭出來了。還好午休完回到公司時，有遮雨棚的位置是空的。車子大剌剌的停了進去，一下子精神都來了，跩的不得了。下雨天停到這個車位，怎麼能跟大太陽天停到這個車位比呢？哼！夏天在這裡休息，才爽呢。車子好樂，決定暫時不罷工了。不管怎麼說，自己都不年輕了，隨便就罷工說不定會被淘汰哩。嗯，還是安份一點好。

(老闆現在正在考慮要買新車，只是車子還不知道)

down time

戲院沒觀眾的時候，畫畫佈景吧。

When no one is in the theatre, paint some scenery.

Tinfoil Hat, by Scott Dunbar

(currently playing on repeat.)

I'm gonna tell my eyes not to see no colours
Tell my ears not to take no lovers
Keep my head underneath the covers
Keep my eyes on you
I don't need no others

Throw away all my old letters
Sit in the kitchen and trim my feathers
Got a picture of you to replace the sky
If I lose you in a crowd
I'll sit down and cry

Got a tinfoil hat that keeps me from dreaming
Gonna sip my wine and stare at the ceiling
Gonna keep my smiles in the breadbox
Til you get home
Choke them down with water
When you leave me all alone

Gonna tell my eyes not to see no colours
Tell my ears not to take no lovers
Gonna keep my head underneath the covers
Keep my eyes on you I don't need no others
Throw away all my old letters
I'll sit in the kitchen and trim my feathers
Got a picture of you to replace the sky
If I lose you in a crowd
I'll lay down
I'll lay down
I'll lay down
I'll lay down
I'll lay down
And I'll die

I don't need
I don't need
I don't need
I don't need
I don't need no others.

Don't be sad

煮飯花 (The Four O' Clock flower).
For you and me.